Captain by alexiuss

The Captain, or Zee Captain, is the egocentric commander of the Crew, consisting of himself, Pilot, Sniper and Engineer. He is quite eccentric, seems slightly unhinged, and yet is probably the last person anyone wishes to pick a fight with.


Capture 4

Young Captain

Captain's history is sketchy, at best. He claims that at one time as a child, he met a deranged man who wanted to "suck out [Captain's]precious eyeball juices with his straw". Captain refuses to share straws with anyone after this incident.

What is confirmed is that he was the subject of Project 7, which aimed to find the luckiest man on earth. Due to this he was given the rank of Captain and was allowed access to ANNET's Core Room where he proceeded to spill hot tea on the servers, causing ANNET to malfunction and attempt to kill everyone in the facility. Dr. Gromov and a few others escaped presumably due to their admin privileges. How Captain escaped is unclear, but it is possibly due to him being the luckiest man on the planet.



The Captain's outfit

The Captain is clad in a heavy black trenchcoat, black leather boots and black leather gloves. A black gas mask with dual filters and pink goggles obscures his face, and a Commander's Hat rests upon his head with a red band around it. He is nearly never seen without his trademark Mug, which has been known to contain various liquids ranging from tea to water to sugary death water. How he drinks it without removing his mask is a mystery.


The Captain is probably the least sane of the crew, except perhaps for Pilot. He is fanciful and absentminded, but he is extremely hard to best - no matter how bad his situation seems to become, he has managed to escape a multitude of dangerous situations, including an angry cult and a horde of zombies - however, the latter was only thanks to the intervention of Sniper, who was captured as a result.

Skills and Equipment


Captain throwing cake

he Captain's main power is his constant good luck. He seems to suffer from a permanent Deus Ex Machina complex - no matter how bad the situation becomes, he is always able to save the day. It is likely that this is the primary trait which made him a perfect candidate for Project 7.

Captain's primary weapon, if it can be called that, is his mug of tea. He has at least once used it's scorching hot contents to disable an alien robot. According to Snippy's journal, he has also used it to threaten his subordinates into submission when they refused to carry out a particular mission. For a brief period, Captain was in possession of a slice of very stale - and presumably radioactive - cake. When threatened, he was able to throw this cake with enough force and accuracy to kill an alien invader through it's helmet. He is also shown to have a "magic satchel", often pulling things, such as a mustache over his gas mask, out of nowhere.

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